Friday, July 13, 2012


THEMED THURSDAY (for real this time).  Here goes nothing. We're talking Villains this week. Big bad villains who are out to get you and your children. And let me tell you how I met some super villains yesterday.

So it goes like this. I walk into a room, doing what I do. Being who I'm supposed to be, in charge, and this looming figure walks up to me. Now, keep in mind that I'm approximately short. For those of you inclined to exactness, 5 feet and 4.5 inches to my name. My stature by no means confines my personality, or my confidence, however when this crooked, tall, figure strode toward me, I couldn't help but cower just slightly behind my kevlar name tag. And I knew her name. Lady Fickle. And she spoke:

"Hello, Kelsey."
"Hello, Lady Fickle."
"There's just something that I need you to do. I was wondering if you could put together a little slide show movie for the evening."
"I could throw about 50 pictures on a power point for you guys. But it will cost you." (note: this is not considered caving to the enemy. It's called luring them into a trap.)
"Don't worry about a price. It's taken care of. That'd be great. If you could meet us early to test it out later that'd be great." (I knew she was right. It was taken care of, but how else to deter her? Nothing came to mind.)
"I'll be there."

Was it a challenge? Was it going to turn my afternoon in to a throw down of global proportions?

Yes. Yes it was.

But the real question remained. How was I going to make a functional working power point with sound and over 50 slides by this afternoon? I knew this deadline was no joke. I could literally be dead on the line, or flat lining with no one to revive my corpse. This is a tragic scenario indeed. So my teleportation capable shoes carried me back to my studio (1, what hero doesn't have cool gadgets? 2, studio? bat cave? cool place for me to do my nifty work and be undetected by my adoring fans-you get it.) And there I quickly uploaded 700 pictures and as they were converting to a secure drive, I deftly placed them in a newly designed power point presentation. All the while decoding the ideal song to play behind the pictures that would count down the minutes for my escape as well as hopefully distract our super villain.

One hour later, and an attempted foiled plot to slow down my super computer, I walk back into the designated place. If this was West Side Story, it would be under the freeway. If this was Zoolander, it would be the convenient runway in the well known abandoned place down the street. If this was a spaghetti stain, this would be on the go because that's where Tide to go is intended to be: EVERYWHERE.

So I walk to the center of the room. She stands there in front of me with her goons behind her. I've come alone (maybe that was an oversight in my plan?) but here I am anyway. She meets me. I reach out my hand with the flash drive. She knows that one false move will be the end.

"This isn't what I wanted."
"Maybe not. But that. Is what you get."

And with that, I buzzed my way out of the now shattering floor and destruction that was radiating from the room I had just left. But I was free. No more worries, and now, she was someone else's villain to battle.

I had lived to right another villain another day.

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