Settlers of "Oh Wait, What's That?"

Settlers of Cattan.

It goes something like this: 

1) Take some cardboard, put it on the floor.

2) Take some wooden pieces painted in colors, and throw them on the cardboard.

3) Draw cards. (Don't ask me where we got any of these materials, we found them in a box)

4) Roll die.

5) Battle- this involves critical words involving the things on the cards and how best to use your wily vocabulary to finagle your needs from the minions around you.

6) Count things

7) Draw cards with other things on them.

8) Wait your turn

9) Glare at the person that seems to have what you want while you wait

10) Steal shit.

11) Repeat steps 2-10 until famine overtakes players.

I feel like you you get rewarded for other things? Like fashion? And best pie? But I didn't read the whole rule book (it has an index.... enough said) and quite frankly, the games I have the mental stamina for only have one of the required pieces listed above, not all of them. Games like

Go Fish-cards

Old maid-cards

Solitaire-cards

Jenga-wooden block things

Candyland-cardboard

A box-just cardboard there too

Kitchen drums-Ok settlers has none of these materials, but it's the kind of game I can handle. And by game, I mean my childhood. (I guess it does involve stealing shit...)

I didn't win. But I guess you knew that already by my in depth description of the game.