Thursday, June 21, 2012

Themed Thursday 3: To Infinity and Beyond

Theme: Obscure Super power.

Details? What does this mean? Is this something that I already have and I'm just letting the greater population know how truly remarkable my talents are? Or is this something I'm looking to purchase on Ebay in the near future. Or a skill? Or a Chimp? (Scratch that last part)

I do know that cannot fall into the realm of traditional super powers. We're talking things like flying and leaping over tall buildings in a single bound, and wearing spandex-nothing common. And for those of you who think wearing spandex is not a super power of comic book lore (therefore common)--you haven't watched enough people in the mall. Get on that.

And here is my attempt at a stroke of genius. And I'm hoping it's one of those things where I just keep typing and the right ideas come to be as I go.

Usually my course of action for such occasions like this-where I'm desperately trying to brainstorm something in order to win a blog-off is a two step process. 1) Ask friends for input. 2) Just write shit down until something brilliant happens.

The results for step one are as follows:

Mariecus: Lying.... Just kidding!

Ava: Spaghetti noodle monster! You can shoot spaghetti out of your fingers and stuff!
Me: But why?
Ava: So you can always eat spaghetti-duh.
Mariecus: Yeah, and tie people up and shit.

Mariecus: Being annoying.

Thank you panel.

Here are the results of step two. Look mom, no hands!

The most useful power I could possibly possess would be the ability to some how manipulate time. "But that's cheating!" With a freeze ray, I could stop! (See what I did there?) That would give me ample time to get things done, I could sleep, read for fun during the school year, and even extend my 10 minute speeches just a little longer than usual.

But instead, I will settle for my second most useful power, Speedy Reader.  This is a practical tool for many aspects of my life.
Application 1: Lit Finder 2000.  I love speech, I really truly honestly do. But if there's any part of it I would rather just skip, it would be finding lit. I would likely kill to be able to find the right piece the first time. And I would use my powers for good! Think of all the time I'd save in the summer finding lit for other people too! I'm so nice. Sort of. But instead of spending 8 hours reading, searing for one 10 minute cutting (for me? about 600 words), I could find 30 pieces in that time! How miraculous is that? Speed reading to find the good stuff faster. And that way if I could read the entire book in 30 seconds (max) instead of spending all day.

Like this:


This could be useful beyond the world of speech. I mean, I could get my reading for classes done faster too. And who couldn't use that extra time?

So there you have it. The Super Power I wish I had.

No comments:

Post a Comment