Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Herding art viewers

After completing my Cin City midterm, I rushed home to make a very messy grilled mozzarella and tomato sandwich (it fell apart, sad day) before I headed over to the other side of town to pick up my parents and go to the Vatican museum. Weee!!!!  Fun stuff right?

Ok, three things here.

1) Erica and I have already discussed this, but you should be made aware of the new laws regarding camera usage. Basically, in order to purchase a camera with a flash, you must not only complete a 12 hour training course, but you must also take a lengthy exam including an essay that details what kind of damage you can actually do to others as well as art with a flash.  After this, you may then obtain your certification badge that will allow you to purchase a camera with a flash. If you still want to purchase a camera without going through these lines, draw a picture.

Until this law is enacted, I will resort to violence, yelling in different languages, and ultimately calling over uniformed security guards to escort you out of the premise where you will then pay hefty fines because of your idiocy and ignorance.

Have a nice day.

2) The modern art in the Vatican Museum (yep, that's what I thought, you're now thinking, say what? Modern art? huh....) gets almost no love. Where you can walk at a steady shuffling pace through the entire museum with 45,000 other people looking at fresco after fresco after tapestry after model after ancient Greek sculpture, by the time you get to the modern art collection, there are a grand total of 3 people in the room. And two of them are guards. For serious. Some of it is absolutely stunning too! It's just that either people just would rather spend their time craning their necks at the Sistine ceiling (I mean no disrespect), or just no one really likes modern art. If it is in fact the later, I am sad.

3) The Pieta makes me cry.

See? that wasn't so bad of a list. After we managed to escape the giant crowds, we went back to the apartment a la parentals and eventually went to dinner. Dinner with the fam is always interesting, mainly because my father has taken the sudden notion to not like pasta.  What's not to like about pasta? I haven't the foggiest, but he insists that having pasta 3 times this week is more than sufficient. I think he's wrong, but let the world judge when he orders things like "fish" and gets exactly what he wanted. Only half of that is a lie, you can decide which half.

Consequently, we went to an Irish pub instead. I mean, I don't personally mind, because, let's face it, I've been eating Italian food for almost 2 months now (holy schnockies-that long already? Woof-da) and to spice it up a little with fish and chips is not a bad option. But within a week, you can certainly make it around Italy eating Italian food with no complaints. Yes, that is me casting judgment on my father, don't worry about it.

So after that little adventure, I headed back to the apartment (mine this time) and reviewed for my midterm in the morning.  Everybody's excited now.

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